Corin Chellberg's online something or other

Just by writing this post, I’m probably opening myself up to having my employment terminated.  I’ll keep you posted.  I just want to quickly mention how stupid Kmart’s social media policy is.  In short, it’s an agreement new employees have to sign, which has several reasonable requirements, and a few not so reasonable requirements.  I couldn’t find this policy anywhere online, so this is from memory.  The reasonable sections basically state:

• You may not divulge confidential information about Kmart or Sears on social networks (or anywhere) – confidential being information that isn’t readily available to the general public
• You may not defame/criticize Kmart or its employees on social networks.  – Here, I’d prefer to be able to trash talk my boss if the need arose, but I understand the intent and it’s mostly reasonable.

Here’s the unreasonable bit:

• You may not use profanity on social networks.

My reaction? Fuck that shit.  I can get behind keeping company secrets off of Facebook, and I can get behind protecting managers from public defamation, but restricting what WORDS I choose to use on Facebook/Twitter merely because they offend some people, who would supposedly connect my words with Kmart and take their business elsewhere?  This, my friends, is complete and utter bullshit.  I’m not sure if this is actually unconstitutional or not, but it seems that way to me.  I know there’s a line between your right to free speech and the rights of others impacted by your speech, but my feeling is that Kmart should not be able to fire me for saying “Fuck you, Glenn Beck.”

Now then.  I’m not actually that concerned about this, because it’s next to impossible to enforce.  With my privacy settings, I’d have to be friends with someone in Kmart’s management (someone who actually gave a shit and checked Facebook often), which I am not, to get caught.  But even so, I think it’s a stupid addition to a mostly reasonable agreement.

What if this life is a test of our reason/logic? Those who believe in (a) God without sufficient proof are proven unworthy and those who withhold belief until sufficient evidence is present are granted entry into the hereafter? That’d be weird, huh?

Possibly the most depressing take on a computer nerd’s life I’ve ever seen.  Almost makes me want to use my computer less.  Almost.

I usually have a lot of odd dreams and the odder they are the longer they stick around in my head, I have some that are still bouncing around in my noggin from years ago.  So now I invite you to take an odd trip with me as I list some of my weirdest dreams in order from less weird to weirdest.

1.I have a lot of driving dreams where I do a lot of crashing, even before I started driving.

2.  Sometimes I play Call of duty and World of Warcraft in my dreams.

3.I’m driving down to the farm where I sometimes go camping and having trouble steering and breaking I run the car off the road and whip the back around.  One of the guys we go camping with drives by and gives me a disappointed look.  I wake up

4. A friend and I were going to different places shooting people, the rest of the dream was us cleaning the guns.  And oddly we we’re ok with the whole thing.

5. The college humor staff and I were outside playing on a bouncy castle and making little kids watch because we couldn’t afford to go to the super bowl.  Thats as far as I’ll write about that one.

6.I start off in an area that reminds me of a Call of Duty map next to me is a field of grapes (idk what its called) on the other side of that a building with several windows and one open doorway across from me is a street with several abandoned cars and zombies roaming, I duck down to hide from them and run into the building where I get attacked and die.  I respawn in the same area, this is when I realize its a dream and tell myself I need a shot gun, I look down and have a double barrel this won’t due.  I think about a better shotgun for dealing with zombies and all the sudden I have a tactical shotgun and I’m ready to go. I run back into the building people following close behing I jump into a hole in the floor that leads to a small one windowed room.  A grenade gets throwen in and I knock it back out the hole with the gun and they throw another in I hit it again this time it came back at me I hit it again but it still didnt make it out of the hole.  I woke myself up, I didn’t want to die.

7.I’m riding in the back seat of a truck in the desert the passenger reaches over to the driver and cuts off his fingers with a pair of scissors. I wake up

8.I walk down stairs in my house open the front door outside there are cop cars and humvee’s in the yard, helicopters are flying around, I close the door and walk into the laundry room some how I know what I need to do I walk into the laundry room and the freezer is knocked over behind it are to aliens hissing and throwing things at me, I pull an amulet out of no where and give it back to them. I wake up

9.My whole family was preparing to go on a trip but we couldn’t find my mom, I go into my room and lying on my bed is a human skeleton, I look under my bed into air ducts and see ducks waddling through them, the ducks ate my mom.

10.I’m trapped in a mine with a bunch of people I used to go to school with.  There’s barrels full of black powder laying around everywhere and half of them are on fire a box explodes across from me buring a girl I run across the mine and start digging her out from under barrels of black powder as more burning ones pile fall in front of me I toss them to the side I find her hand and pull her out.  A few men find a steel door that’s bolted shut they slap some C4 on it and blow it open, we all walk out of the mine, when we emerge its me and several British chaps smoking pipes walking down a hill by a lake and we get attacked by a leprechaun a man swings his cane at it and knocks it out he then stomps it to death and kicks it into the lake.  We have to cross over a field of lilly pads to get to the other side of the lake so we start to walk over while the pads hold our weight perfectly, I see the leperchauns body lying on a lilly pad ahead of me a pull out a golf club and walk over to it, I raise my club and the pad starts to sink I take a quick swing before I fall into the water and wake up.

So that is a collective of some of my weirdest dreams, I’m sure I’ll be able to add more in the future.

Twilight:  The first thing that even made me pick up the book was the mere fact that it was popular. Not usually a good reason to pick anything, but in general, I would say you’re pretty safe with that one. The beginning wasn’t terribly interesting, and the storyline was typical… unless you’ve kept your head somewhere damp, dark, and unpleasant for the last year, you pretty much know what’s going to happen this entire book, which made it slightly more disappointing than it would be normally. Overall though, it was better than I was expecting, despite “haters.” As for grammar mistakes, I didn’t notice any right off, except for maybe like…once, where there was a quotation missing at the end of a sentence. BIG DEAL. I’ve probably broken a few dozen simply writing this.

[Note from Corin: She reads freakisly fast and I am jealous.]